The feeling of rejection of one is one of the most painful emotions, and it creates great traumas.
When the rejection, it comes on the part from that what more we admire / we love, these traumas are impediment, for the 'development' of the person.
The attention, given, for whose part we love, we admire, it is essential to his development, as soon as it contributes to the apprenticeship of the tolerance, generosity and empathy.
Each person wants to feel what is special, the only and loved, for to that what it admires. In fact it is. So, in this world, if we have someone who admires us, who is special. The problem, the fact is that the persons are very occupied, looking for ' stereotypes '.
The problem increases when the father leaves in defense of the daughter. Because you link the fact is that they are jealous of the daughter.
One of the factors, which the cause is: daughters who have bigger characteristics of the paternal family .
It is possible that this mother feeds this hostility between other brothers and it adopts '.
The daughter, for his time, feels rejected by the mother and by the brothers.
The great taboos in the familiar psychology produce discomfort even in thought. Between the abominable subjects - and avoided at all costs in the discussions at home - they are the preference of the father, or of the mother, for one of the children, the rejection for other.
The disappointment with the baby after the birth - when a child of another sex was waited or with determined characteristics - and / or the hidden wish of the parents of be releasing of the children to tan a moment alone. In the land of the veiled hostilities, nothing is more difficult for a mother of what to admit a competition with the daughter.
' The mothers who supported his lives in the beauty, for example, have difficulty in tolerating the beauty of the daughters ', it affirms, studious of the human behaviour.
Some ' mothers throw themselves to the attacks, but it was acting behind the scenes, to restrict the professional and loving ascent of her daughters, using other her children, Promoting the discord between brothers , for conquest of her finality.
' Generally, it is lacking in this mother to conscience of you herself and of his paper in the motherhood ', di Caroline Eliacheff and Nathalie Heinich, authors of the book ' Mothers - Daughters - A Relation to Three ' the father Is easier to say “ I love you ” for the daughter of what for the son. Because that takes place?
The father is common to have more affinity with the girl of what with the boy, as well as the mother with the boy, instead of the girl.
Since the father differentiates his behaviour regarding the son and the daughter, for the intimacy itself that he has with her saying is easier it links it that the nursemaid. On the other side, for a cultural question, men do not usually talk about his feelings for other men, are closed in you themselves, therefore it is more difficult to a father to say what the son loves.
On the other side, in most of the cases the father usually prunes more the daughter, not leaving that she does any things, whereas the son has more freedom.
The one that owes that to herself?
The father idealizes her daughter like a princess and, as such, she must be preserved of the suffering and of other men, who, in his majority, according to him (the father), only want to be used of her or do to him some evil. The father has more difficulty in accepting that his daughter grows and becomes a woman, because of always seeing it like a naive and childlike person. Besides, for the culture itself still in force, it suits to a boy to have the whole freedom of the world to become a man as short as possible.
When what, as different reasons, the daughters girls, has bigger affinity with the father, and the boys, bigger affinity with the mother was scientifically proved.
Completely a question of ' feeling ' importantly, protection (natural laws, which bring near the human being of the animal: extinguished).
These relations, where the daughters girls are rejected, for the mother, are in bigger cases than it is possible to imagine.
The same thing takes place, very often, with father that reejita the son boy, for equal questions.
The grandmothers, it has a basic paper, in all this history. Most times, the education of this child, it will be carried out by the grandparents.
The fact is, completely this, it must be talked about.
Of course the ignorance. The less of the faith , good value, make the human to do instinctive acts.
Have many man, that , hate daughter, when wait the firstly baby a son, and wasborn a girl. This is total ignorance.
Our childrem are big gift from Allah(c) . They are the humanity. We need to love as a brother, sister, mother , father. Are precious to our live, more than our self. the need us all their life. All our life.
Our Duty, in this world, also: to love
Allah(cc) looking our acts, heart , intentions. We cannot to forget this.
May Allah(cc) to protect us, giving help to us, to learn, to understand , more. And to be in the right way, helping the Ummah to grown. inshAllah.
